Land “Snakes” Alive !!!

A snake-handling preacher was bitten and killed by a rattlesnake on Saturday.

And it’s about goddamn time.  With a name, occupation, and penchant for religious looney activities that can only come from Kentucky, wide-eyed Kentucky Pentecostal preacher,  Jamie Coots, finally fucked around with the wrong snake and one that didn’t much cotton to his religious rantings.  A rattler,  an atheist snake no doubt, bit and done killed him.  Finally.

Jamie Coots gone to meet his maker thanks to........

Jamie Coots gone to meet his maker thanks to……..

...this guy...our hero.

…this guy…our hero.

Believe it or not, they actually made a reality TV show, called Snake Salvation, out of this guy dancing around with snakes while speaking in tongues and taking his own worthless life in his own hands week in and week out.   Coots has been bitten eight times before during his 21 year reign of handling snakes.  But on Saturday some snake had apparently had it up to here with his bullshit and bit the fuck out of him.  Coots, being Pentecostal, refused medical treatment figuring god would come through for him.  God, in true form,  didn’t bail him out.  Maybe there is a god after all.

Coots’ wife, daughter, and son will carry on  his legacy and continue dancing with snakes. In fact, they’re celebrating Coots life by dancing with snakes around his corpse right now at his wake.


After they get done, assuming they, too, don’t get bit, all of them and a bunch of  other in-bred, toothless pedophile family members and friends will all head to Cracker Barrel for Sunday Brunch.

cracker barrel

…which begs the question, don’t they have anything better to do in Kentucky?

The clear answer to that is yes:



25 responses to “Land “Snakes” Alive !!!

  1. Lefty, you still got it going on my friend. Love this. Too bad Ertle the Turtle wasn’t home visiting with the Snake Master. lol

  2. LMAO , Thanks I needed that this morning.

  3. Never heard of this guy, but I’m assuming that the snakes, up until the end, were an affirmation of faith. I wonder what Coots’ flock believes now?

  4. I all wanta tank you al fer takin da time to rote yrr bitchyary bout my dadda-oncle-brudda. he were a bery revrunt mon. all us down home had r wake (sp?) fer him ta-uddr dey an it was bery revrunt. tanks agin!
    Booby Mo Jo III

  5. thatsitfortheotherwon

    You’ve got a lot of goddamn nerve, Southpaw, starting up your blog again without putting out a NOTAM or a signal flare or something!

    Good to see you back at it! LOL at these hicks.

  6. thatsitfortheotherwon

    In related news, these fuckers are also SLOW LEARNERS!

    • ….w/ a name like Cody Coots, you just know there’s gotta be a rattler out there somewhere gunnin’ for you. After being fatally bitten by a nasty rattler, his snake-dancing Pentecostal father’s last words to Cody, as he cradled him in his arms: “Avenge me Cody !! Avenge me”. Cody Coots, with his jaw clinched,promised his father that he would dance w/ snakes even if it killed him….which made his father happy as he took his last breath….blissfully.

  7. Will the crazies ever learn ? playing playing with poisonous snakes and GOP ers is detrimental to your health.

  8. Great to see you again, Southpaw. Live by the snake, die by the snake. The idiot got what he deserved.

  9. Hey Southpaw, I hope you and yours are doing OK and you’re having a good summer. Give the pup a scritch from me. 🙂

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