Pussy Face Erectus


Famed anthropologist, Dr. I. Yankit, who discovered pussy face erectus explains its uniqueness, history, and evolution to his students at MIT:

“Ladies and gentleman…it is in this being that we have essentially discovered the missing link between regular people and the legions of pussy American men who are soulless, evangelical eunuchs.”

Dr. I. Yankit

Dr. I. Yankit

“Is it a he or she, doctor?”

“Well, that would be the million dollar question, Mr. Smithers, to which there are no easy answers.  Therefore, I have simply been referring to it as it.  Notice the large hips and waist similar to those of a woman…and the petite hands with no visible signs of ever having done any labor of any kind in its life…that is, except for the curious callouses on its right hand suggesting less of labor and more of it having spent an extraordinary amount of time gratifying itself….perhaps as much as 18 times a day.”

ted-cruz

Pussy Face Erectus

“What about its sex organs doctor…does it have any?”

“Another good question.  Pussy face erectus SEEMS to have the penis of a male….yet it is one of the smallest recorded in history on a male specimen.  For that reason I’m unable to fully determine its gender.”

“What about its face, Professor?  I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“Well that is because there never HAS been anything like it, Mr. Smithers.  Notice the pasty and puffy cherub cheeks as well as the sharp nose.  Notice the beady, cold, and expressionless eyes and the thin lips and small, sharp teeth not entirely unlike those of a man-eating piranha.  Then there are the jowls underneath its chin.  Notice the hanging bags of fat historically found almost exclusively underneath the chins of fat, carpet-bagging, pedophilic, southern evangelical preachers.”

...notice jowls, sharp and small teeth...and thin lips

…notice jowls, sharp and small teeth…and thin lips

“So, Professor….you earlier stated that you could ascertain the personality of pussy face erectus based on its body type and facial features.”

“Absolutely Ms. Bailey….almost beyond a reasonable doubt, I can ascertain that pussy face erectus is a miserable cretin and horrible human being devoid of any soul…empty to the core with no loyalty to anyone but itself.”

Professor I. Yankit estimates that Pussy Faceerectus would have been a classic coward and a miserable, cretin with an empty soul

Professor I. Yankit maintains that pussy face erectus is a classic coward and a miserable, cretin with an empty soul

“Additionally, it is predisposed to be a demagogue in the name of religion not unlike the religious zealots responsible for the Salem witch burnings.  As a leader, it is the quintessential coward who will send others to war and to their deaths while refusing to serve, yet calling others who did serve disloyal.  It uses empty words like ‘freedom’ and ‘patriot’ and symbols like the American flag to obfuscate its extreme anti-social personality.”

“It’s a hideous creature, Professor.”

“Indeed it is, Ms. Jenkins….yet we must study pussy face erectus in an effort to understand the phenomena of pussy, evangelical, eunuch men in America.”

“And then what, Professor?”

“Well, when we finish I’ll just toss its filthy carcass in the incinerator out back and just hope we never see another like it.”

Study, learn, and destroy...hoping for never another like it

Study and learn

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6 responses to “Pussy Face Erectus

  1. Pussyface is actually just a pile of slime that chose one of the pussyfaces from the hall of shame wall loacated in the goper bagger shit hole . All slime balls get to choose the face they want to wear . There on the shame wall lay the most hideous faces one will ever see . and if you happen to throw up on the wall it is expected so dont fret just move on and exit the building as fast as you can you dont want to fall into the shame wall or you may end up falling on a face you cant stomach and will be stuck with.

  2. That fucker is still using Brylcreem! Pussy face hermaphrodite…

  3. thatsitfortheotherwon

    Thanks. Now I need eye cleanser.

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